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Codes by 16thday!Background from here, profile icon from thefadingnight. |
Thursday, June 14, 2012
2:09 AM
Typing over here really needs some time to get used to, it just looks so strange.I've been trying to cut down on vulgarities, so no f word or swearing. I don't even know why I wanted to do it. I guess it just doesn't leave a very good impression on people and it's some weird unconscious attempt to be more mature. It's actually not that difficult to censor out all those words, the real problem is when I'm feeling annoyed or not in a good. I become snappish, rude and will start cursing. It happens the most when I lack sleep. So it actually happens pretty often. It's working though! I even get annoyed when I hear others speak profanities, especially when they use the very vulgar words. Not very sure if it's a good thing though, I like being open-minded. I don't know how that links, but brain is weird like that. Sleeping early is also something I've been trying to change for the better. Fine more like sleeping enough hours instead, sleeping early sounds highly ambitious for me. Though it should be more of was trying. I was sleeping at least 6 hours per night. So I go to bed at roughly midnight, at times 1AM on Monday mornings since school starts later. I have never mentioned it to anyone but sleeping early is SO DIFFICULT. I have to constantly check the clock at night and make myself panicky so I will do things quicker. There were so many times when I had to just chuck my homework aside and go to bed. It sounds weird but it's like... an addiction to sleep deprivation. I had to physically force myself to go to bed and all. I don't know why it's so, I guess my sleep cycle is just weird. My friend oh so kindly told me to give up and said it's a crazy idea. Such a great pal. I lasted for a little more than month, which I really didn't expect. It didn't pay off at first, I was still sleepy. It started getting better, I was almost never in a foul mood and didn't fall asleep in class as much. And it feels incredible to wake up ultra early and get things done, you feel so accomplished because you actually did work even before it's noon. So anyway, I was doing fine until holidays came along and happily screwed my sleep hours. I should keep a record of my sleeping times, it's insane. It's so nuts it's actually bordering on ridiculous. I highly suspect I have some mild sleeping disorder... Insomnia or the like. On more than 2 occasions I slept at 6AM. To me it isn't that bad if you get to sleep in, except I had to go back to school so I had to wake up at 7 plus. It was more of a nap to be honest. Actually, even worse since most of the time when I nap it's for hours but that's just an hour. Since I'm used to surviving on little sleep and my body has some weird ability, I can actually function. What's abnormal is only my temper and how I will conk out after a few days. The experience is terrible. My mother always wakes me up halfway through my sleep and I will be groggy. Not fully awake yet so I have no idea what's going on. When I am truly awake, I will be in the state where everything's foggy. Have no idea what happened/what time it is/what day is it. Everything feels jumbled up and all thoughts are in a mess. Not very good to wake up to and start the day with, I can assure you that. I don't know why I'm rambling on about sleep, I think it's because I have slight issues with it. Trying to adjust back to "normal" sleep hours since school's starting soon. Scratch that, I have to. I was just looking at piercings and nape piercing looks really really cool! Looks painful though. But sigh it looks pretty. Am so convinced to get a second ear hole and helix piercing. I am a coward though, scared shitless about the pain. You Me At Six won Kerrang! Best British Band, for the second year running. I'm so happy for them. :') I was just watching their videos and they are so hilarious. They are so dorky. Somehow I vaguely remember saying I love dorky people... dorkable. But I can't recall why I said it! It's so frustrating when your're trying to remember but you can't. Holidays have been pretty cool, except that I have to go back to school for supplementary classes and CCA. But to be honest I can't even remember what I've been doing much...I think it's the same with others? I have been hearing that from a few people, how time just flies and and more than half the holidays is already gone. I went to my friend's house twice, watched live on the murder scene! Finally, have been talking about it for ages. We just chilled and slacked around, played games. That's actually pretty much what I do all day. On random days after school I will go for lunch with someone. Oh I went to WL's school funfair with SK! Quite cool, although the everything was soooo expensive. We didn't get to play much since money is limited. Went out for Japanese food on a Saturday with family and my grandmother. I love family time because I get to eat good food and spend time with them. Had cold soba with tempura, chawanmushi and some hokkaido ice cream. Was so full and happy after that. For sabbaticals one of my courses was graphic novels. I don't know what others think of it but I think it's so cool! I now have this newfound interest for comic books/graphic novels. I went to borrow Fables because it seems like a good read and man it's good! Unfortunately for me the second book is not available at the library. I don't know how I'm going to continue. I have CCA tomorrow, need to reach at 8.15 AM. Fantastic, I know. Have a great holidays all x. |